As I watch Golf Jesus birdie 3 of the first 4 of his opening-round back nine to move into a tie for fourth, I had to wonder what has happened to Yaweh? A closer look at his scorecard shows that he is 1-over on the two par 5s at Firestone. Something almost unimaginable less than a decade ago. Woods' failure with both the long and short sticks in his bag will probably mean another calendar year without a major championship. And if you think I'm getting ahead of myself, Woods was just at Oak Hill (site of the PGA Championship) on Tuesday and he's already complaining about the greens being spotty and not having enough thatch. Thatch? Really, Eldrick? Why are you worried more about agronomy than you are of your putting stroke or having no mental edge anymore? Fix the flat stick. Drive it straight. Finish on a weekend. Then, and only then, will you be back.